Category: Moments, Thoughts, Life

I heard myself say, “I want God for you.” Then I stopped and asked myself what does that mean. It means I want whatever God has in store for you. I want Him to be in total control of your life. I want you to love, depend and trust Him.

“I want God for you” sounds honorable, perhaps even super spiritual. Then I asked myself, “What does that mean for me?” I was humbled by the response.  “I want God for you” requires me to give up any control I have of your life. No matter what our relationship is, it requires letting go of your hand and allowing you to walk ahead or behind if you so choose.

“I want God for you” forces me to realize that my hopes and dreams for you are just that – mine.  They are not yours and it is unfair of me to expect you to fulfill them for me. This thought takes humility to the next level. It brings to the surface a multitude of personal scares, crushed dreams and unfulfilled hopes.

“I want God for you” makes me promise to give up my viewpoint. This is not my point of view; this is the level from which I view your life. I must realize that my vantage point is limited; it may be scarred, and is likely blurred. I must trust God, as He sees the beginning and the end. I, of course, cannot.

In short, “I want God for you” means:

• I give up control
• I realize the my hopes and dreams for you are mine not yours
• I relinquish my view point, that is the vantage point I have when I view your life.

“I want God for you” requires me to:

• Give you to God and trust you are in His control
• No longer place my hopes and dreams on your life, rather my hopes for you must become the plans that God has for you.
• Trust that God is watching you from His view point, He sees what I cannot.

I can honestly say, with all my being that “I want God for you!”

This thing called anger keeps crossing my path.  I read a blog this morning where a woman talked about living with a very angry man. It should have been no surprise that after 2 years of dating a very angry man he would become an angry live-in, but some people are just unable to connect the dots.

In my own life I have learned that anger is a defense emotion. When we become angry we are protecting ourselves. When I feel the anger begin to boil I stop and ask myself: What am I protecting?  And if I just stopped being angry, what would that say about me? Amazingly it works.

I thought I should do a little research on what the Bible said about anger. I was going to write some fantastic, deep, life changing blog on the spiritual aspects of anger, but after reading the verses I realized that there is no deep, life changing spiritual aspect of anger.  The Bible simply says we should feel it but we shouldn’t act on it. I guess that is the take-away.  Anger requires an action.  We are left to decide what that action will be.

Lead with your ears, follow up with your tongue, and let anger straggle along in the rear. God’s righteousness doesn’t grow from human anger. So throw all spoiled virtue and cancerous evil in the garbage. James 1:19 Translation: keep anger in the trunk.

…because our anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. James 1:20 So God doesn’t want a bunch of angry people walking around down here? I think we should let that be known.

But now put away and rid yourselves [completely] of all these things: anger, rage, bad feeling toward others, curses and slander, and foulmouthed abuse and shameful utterances from your lips! Colossians 3:8 Apparently we do have the ability to get rid of the bad stuff…who knew?

Go ahead and be angry. You do well to be angry—but don’t use your anger as fuel for revenge. And don’t stay angry. Don’t go to bed angry.  Ephesians 4 ~ Message So it’s alright to feel anger? Yep, just don’t use it.

Let all bitterness and indignation and wrath (passion, rage, bad temper) and resentment (anger, animosity) and quarreling (brawling, clamor, contention) and slander (evil-speaking, abusive or blasphemous language) be banished from you, with all malice (spite, ill will, or baseness of any kind). Ephesians 4:31 Now there’s a list of emotions that are life suckers.

Do not make friends with the hot-tempered, do not associate with those who are easily angered,
Proverbs 22:23 I wish the poor lady who is now stuck living with the angry man would have read this while they were dating.

Mockers stir up a city, but the wise turn away anger. Proverbs 29:7 Anger requires an action…even if it is just tuning it away.

I’m greatly confused by those so called conservative, right wing and tea party-ers.  At what point in time did the Constitution allowing for freedom of speech void the Godly principle of respecting authority? Why is it acceptable to speak out in anger and disrespect for our elected leaders?

As I think of the Old Testament bible stories, I am reminded of Daniel, Esther and those three guys, Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. Weren’t all these individuals living in foreign lands?  Weren’t they all being ruled by kings they didn’t vote for? Yet, God somehow figured out how to use them in ways that change entire kingdoms.

Perhaps these individuals were used by God because they held tightly to their beliefs and were willing to pay the consequence if the King didn’t agree with them. Perhaps they were useful to God because they understood that no matter who is in control, God Almighty still reigns. Perhaps their names are recorded in history because they understood that obeying God’s rules was more important than their freedom of speech. Perhaps they were taught as children to respect authority.

I wonder what our country would be like if those so called conservative, right wing, tea party-ers where actually men and women whose lives mirrored those of Daniel, Esther and those three guys? Wouldn’t it be ironic if those screaming for America to return to its Christian heritage were the ones standing in the way?

I’m thinking we should clip a few right wings so we can stop flying in circles.

I had the opportunity to spend a few days with co-workers as we participated in a team building retreat. We played games, made a human chain that had to move from one end of a log to the other without breaking the chain or falling off the log. In the afternoon we were taken out of doors to a rope course. High above the ground was a series platforms connected by rope bridges.

I successfully climbed up to the main platform, sat down and remained there watching the others make their way with laughter and screams from one platform to the next. I was very comfortable sitting where I was, after all just climbing up that high was a great accomplishment for me.

A vision of that platform and rope bridge has been very vivid in my imagination recently. If given the chance now, I do believe that I would confidently step out and cross that bridge. In fact, there have been a few times over the past few weeks when I have felt hesitant, fearful or apprehensive and I see myself standing on that platform confidently stepping onto the bridge. Laughing at myself, I say, “Well, that wasn’t so bad.”

I have always been very independent. There are several reason for this, the main one comes from childhood were I felt there was no one there to help me. As I’ve envisioned myself stepping off the platform, I am stepping off alone. Why have I never asked someone to hold my hand and walk with me? Why am I still trying to do it all by myself? To be honest, I don’t know.

I have a dentist appointment coming up and I can think of a thousand reasons why I should cancel it. I’ve even stepped off the platform and it hasn’t changed my mind. So I thought I should try asking for help. Jeff will come with me and hold my hand, because I’m tired of doing it alone.

…if you ever catch me standing tall, preparing to take a giant step to the right, feel free to take my hand as I am starting to enjoy not doing it alone.

A phone conversation with Chase, our 4 year old grandson…

Hello.

Hi.

Who is this?

This is Chase Hardwick Matthew.

Well hello Chase Hardwick Matthew.

Do you know what I did?

What?

I colored all over myself.

You did?

Mom took all my toys out of my room.

She did?

Do you know Goodwill?

Yes…

She’s going to give them all to Goodwill.

That’s what happens sometimes.

I colored all over.

Do you think that was a good decision?

No.

What are you going to do to fix it?

I could color on paper.

That sounds like a good choice to me….

Do you want to talk to Raun now?

Sure.

A year ago, Chase was walking up our stairs and I heard him say, “Well that wasn’t a good decision.”  I never figured out what he had done, but obviously the kid has a handle on decision making – even if it isn’t always the right one.

I have heard and have actually repeated the phrase ‘enjoy the journey’ hundreds, perhaps thousands of times. Typically enjoying the journey relates to the process it takes to achieve something tangible; a promotion, the end of a trip, the fulfillment of a life’s dream.

We, however, are all on a journey every day.  It is a journey with no guaranteed result, there is no tangible prize awaiting us.  In fact, few of us can imagine the finish line. It is full of struggles, pain, survival and failure.  This journey is simply called life.

As a parent and grandparent, I realize how much we strive to protect our children from this journey. We don’t want them to get hurt, to experience pain, to feel disappointment, to fail or struggle in anyway. All honorable intentions but are we cheating them out of the journey?

What if we taught children how to cope with disappointment, to see failure as if it were a reward for putting forth the effort?  What if we had been taught that our struggles are the breath of life and without them we are useless?

I walked along the beach this morning thinking about this journey called life. I was reminded of the millions of children whose childhood is full of struggles; struggles that ranged from growing up in war torn countries, children whose daily routine allows them to simply survive, children whose home life is less than perfect. These are all broken children and the world is full of them. My heart ached.

As the tide moved out it left an unusual amount of shells behind. They were beautiful.  They turned the brown sand into a festival of color.  I looked down at the shells that brought such beauty this morning and I realized that these were all broken shells. It was their brokenness that brought such beautiful to the shoreline. These shells had experience the natural progression of life; they had taken life’s journey.

Being broken is the journey. Disappointment, pain, failure and struggles are just as much a part of life as air, water and fire. If we allow our broken lives to make life’s journey; to accept disappointment, to allow ourselves to feel pain instead of avoiding it, to see our failure as a result of actually putting forth an effort and to accept struggles as a sign that we are alive, we could truly begin to ‘enjoy the journey’.

In fact, we may find ourselves surrounded by others who are also broken. And wouldn’t it be a hoot if we begin to see the beauty in our brokenness? Now that’s a journey worth taking!