Category: Family

My mom’s an interesting person. All her life she has lived for others.  She is a servant. In fact, she is a servant to a fault. At times I tell her she needs to be servant, not a slave.

Ethel will be 83 in April. She has been alone for three and a half years; I believe it’s the first time in her entire life. She appears to be growing younger. I have had the privilege of spending several weeks with her this past year as we served others in our family.  Most recently, she came to Colorado for 2 weeks to support my daughter after Emery was born.

When we met at the airport she introduced me to her new friend that she made on the flight. The woman looked as if she wanted to hug me. As we were leaving baggage claim, she did hug my mom and said, “I learned so much from you.” It was a two hour flight; God only knows what they talked about. I’m used to this however; every time mom comes to visit she tells me in great detail all about the person she sat next to.

A few months ago, mom joined Curves. It is no surprise that other Curve members come up to her daily to tell her what an inspiration she is. She is grandma to many adopted grandchildren. In fact, I think she has more personal relationships now than she has ever had.

Mom worries a lot; is concerned for the well being of her ever growing family. Mom also laughs a lot. There are countless times that we find ourselves laughing so hard it hurts. I also found out that she is obsessed with looking at the clock during the night. The room we shared most recently had no clock, so mom would check her cell phone all through the night for the time. How do I know this? Frequently she would hit the camera button and take a picture; a noise that is difficult to mute. There were 46 black pictures stored on her phone; giving us yet another reason for a good laugh.

Servant or slave, mom will always be willing to give. Someone said recently that they didn’t think they could verbalize what mom believes. I guess that’s because she uses actions more than words.  There are two words that seem appropriate however;  serve and laugh. Not a bad motto.

If you had been around to witness those times when Austyn and I received positive reports on our little Emery, you may have noticed us grab the other’s hand and say, “She’s third generation!”

We are never quite sure how to finish that sentence. You see, Emery is the third generation of female infants who defied statistics and survived. Fifty years ago, I was a placenta previa birth. Odds back then weren’t high. I survived. I have some issues but nothing that has hindered me too much.

Austyn was what we refer to as a Smurf Baby. She managed to get the cord wrapped around her neck 5 times prior to delivery and by the time they untangled her she was blue. She too has some issues but clearly nothing that has prevented her from a very full life.

So Emery makes three. There is a unique bond that I feel with her. Perhaps it is the feeling of fighting for life when you are too little to know what’s happening. Each time we get one of those “what if” reports I find myself whispering to her, “You can do it, you’re third generation and we all make it!”

Emery clearly has a much bigger battle to win and there is no doubt she’ll do it excellently. I will be 50 in February and figure I have 42 more years to overcome my issues. Austyn will be 25 in February and her list of adventures already out does mine. Emery was due in February, however this February we will be celebrating her 3 month birthday. If each generation gets stronger… I can’t wait to see who she becomes…undoubtedly she’ll out do us all!

My medical knowledge has increase just a tad since Emery was born.  I have a greater insight into breathing, pooping, peeing, heart rate and blood pressure. There were two areas that when I began to learn of their importance, brought goose bumps and a few tears.

While Austyn was in labor, every doctor and nurse seemed to be focused on one thing, allowing this baby to be born naturally. In fact at one point, they had rushed Austyn to the ER but as soon as Emery’s heart rate recovered, they stopped the procedure and sent them back to their room.

As it was explained to me, there is a level of stress that is created as a baby makes it through the birth cannel. This stress triggers the organs and lets them know life is changing, that it’s time for them to begin to work; it’s time for them to do what they were created to do. Without this process, she may have had other more serious issues.

Emery had a lot of bruising from this birthing process. Her head was quite dark, her tiny nose had a large spot on it, her right eye was also very dark and there was a bruise on her back. All very normal, we were informed; because she was so tiny and her systems so immature, it would take her body a little longer to heal these bruises, but they would go away.

When it was discovered that there had been some level of bleeding in the brain and that Emery required a procedure to allow the fluid that was now collecting around her brain to be drained, did we begin to understand the importance of the bruising. Bruising stretches the skin. This allowed for Emery’s little head to expand when the fluid was collecting and protect her from additional pressure. The one thing that prevented her from looking perfect at birth was the very thing that would protect her.

Rarely does God turn water into wine, or send us a million dollars in the mail, or prevent anything bad from every happening; most of the time He uses normal things such as stress and bruising. We miss it! We miss see all the miracles that happen every day. We miss it because we don’t want to feel the stress nor do we want to look at the bruises. It these things that trigger us to become what we were created for. It’s these things that protect us in ways we may never understand.

It’s been almost three weeks since we received that early morning call informing us that our sixth grandchild would be born in a day or so. If this call had come three months later, on the actual due date, there would have been a much greater measure of excitement. Fifteen weeks early and a five and a half month pregnancy filled with complications, this call brought feeling of concern and hesitancy.

When the announcement that Emery Rain Ford had come into the world a whole one pound eleven ounces, wiggling and trying to breathe on her own, a melody began to be repeated in my thoughts; this melody belonged to a song I recall my husband singing many times. Although the melody was clear, I could only recall the first line; Sometimes the light surprises.

Upon my request, Jeff packed the songbook and brought it on his next visit. With songbook in hand, I had the joy of reading through the words:

Sometimes a light surprises the Christian while he sings;

It is the Lord who rises with healing in His wings.
When comforts are declining, He grants the soul again

A season of clear shining, to cheer it after rain.

In holy contemplation we sweetly then pursue

The theme of God’s salvation, and find it ever new;

Set free from present sorrow, we cheerfully can say,

Let the un-known tomorrow bring with it what it may.

It can bring it nothing but He will bear us through;

Who gives the lilies clothing will clothe His people too;

Beneath the spreading heavens, No creature but is fed;

And He who feeds the ravens will give His children bread.

Though vine nor fig tree neither, their wonted fruit should bear,

Though all the field should wither, nor flocks nor herds be there;

Yet God the same a biding, His praise shall tune my voice,

For while in Him confiding, I cannot but rejoice!

~william cowper

Enough said.

 

 

We Skyped Raun frequently.  During one of those calls Jeff scolded the dog by saying “get the hell out of here”.  Again forgetting his audience I hurried he and the dog out of the room and closed the door.  Making my way back to the computer I heard Chase ask where Grandpa Jeff was.

“He said a bad word and I made him sit in the time-out chair.”

“I want to take to him.”

“But he needs to sit for a while.”

“I need to talk to him.”

I left the room to get Jeff and inform him of the seriousness in Chase’s voice.  As Jeff came in view of the computer Chase began his lecture…

“Grandpa Jeff, what you said?”

“I yelled at Ellie.”

“But what you said?”

“I can’t say it again or Grandma will put me in time-out.”

“You have to nice to Ellie.  You have to give her treats.”

“But I can’t give her too many treats or she’ll get fat.”

“You give her just one treat” Holding his finger up to emphasize the ONE. “And you be nice to her.”

“OK”

We had other visitor for New Years, Brain and Austyn flew in to spend a few days with us.  This was not just a visit, they had hoped Brian would find a job here and they would be able to move before the baby come.  It was always Austyn’s desire to live close to us while her children were small.

The trip was successful, they returned to Anchorage with a job offer in hand.  Plans were made.  Austyn would fly in and Brian would load the jeep and trailer on the ferry for a nine day’s journey.  By the middle of February they were both here, safe and sound.  Austyn was 7 months pregnant.  Doctors needed to be found, hospitals toured and birthing classes attended.  There were two short months left to prepare for Liam Barrington Ford.